Being in Relationship
It’s understood in shamanism that everything is a spirit. It’s also understood that to exist means we are in relationship with other beings at all times. This concept is true whether or not we are embodied, as we are always interconnected.
When we find that we have an illness, it means we are somehow in relationship with that spirit of the illness. This requires that we become conscious of how we are in relationship with it. We can begin recognizing the ways in which we communicate with the spirit in non-verbal and verbal ways. One of the ways we can communicate with the spirit of illness is by actively feeding or not feeding the relationship with it. What story are you telling yourself regarding the illness? What do you find yourself saying aloud? Do you believe it?
It’s normal to metabolize thoughts and emotions that often come with managing a life with illness, but we must attune to how we are relating to it overall. You can choose to feed the innate radiance that also lives and breathes within - even if you are struggling with illness. It can be challenging to find that innate radiance underneath all the layers that have already attuned to the spirit of illness, but it’s important to know that we have a choice in that regard. You may not have a choice in being ill, but we can choose to feed or not feed illness. Because when we feed an illness, we are giving our power away to it. When we give our power away to illness, the line between ourselves and the energy of the illness becomes blurred and we can no longer identify ourselves as a sovereign being.
In the world of the spirits, illness is not seen as "good" nor "bad," it just is. Around the world, shamanic cultures have viewed illness as imbalance, incoherence, and even inner conflict. We all have a spectrum of conflicts and imbalances within us at any point in our lives - it’s part of being in a body. But sometimes, like a blaring light on the horizon, an illness reflects back to us that it is imperitive to make some big shifts in our lives in order to bring ourselves back to balance. Often, this task is too big to be undertaken alone. Personally, I will be forever grateful for the supports that appeared on my path at just the right time and in just the right way.
Sometimes the helping spirits view illness as an opportunity. When I was at Nursing Home Level of Care, I would have been hard-pressed to view my illness as an opportunity. But looking back now, I have had the honor of working with many people who have struggled with illness. My view of illness has merged with the views of my helping spirits. I now see illness as a tough-love teacher.
What if within the shadow of the relationship with illness there is potential for you to rebirth a powerful version of yourself? If you find yourself sick, you might ask whether you’re being invited into a new way of being that is awaiting you.
One of the ways you can begin to call in that new way of being for yourself is by carving out some time to write a stream-of-consciousness letter to your illness. Write as if you are writing to a person, because you’ll be addressing the spirit of your illness. Acknowledge any and all emotions or thoughts that need to be aired. Tell the spirit what is in your heart, mind, and soul. Redraft your letter as many times as you feel necessary. When you feel you have moved everything through into the letter, ask yourself if you would like to transform this state of being you have found yourself in. You can tear the letter up and ask the Universe to transmute your thoughts and emotions, or you can leave the letter out in the rain, asking the Spirit of Rain to cleanse the state you have found yourself in during your writing process. One of my favorite ways for transformation is inviting the Spirit of Fire to assist. Fire is a powerful spirit that can read our hearts. Place the letter mindfully into an intentional fire, and feed it dried herbs (local herbs are best!) to thank the Spirit of Fire, while chanting:
Fire, fire rising higher… fire, fire transforming me.
Fire, fire burning brighter… fire, fire transforming me. 🔥
To hear more about the powerful Spirit of Fire, tune in to hear Episode 22: The Element of Fire as my friend and colleague, Bri Andreoni and I chat on our podcast, Shamans After Dark.
The walk through illness can be a lonely one, but remember that you are not alone. There are many beings who are willing to support you, myself included. 💗
